His parents call while you're alone together - and he actually picks up!

He keeps talking about how one of his friends is just perfect for you.

You accidentally drip ice cream on your tube top and he doesn't leap to "help you" wipe it off.

You write him racy IMs but instead of flirting back he has to update his blog.

When you invite him to a movie he says he has to stay in and do homework.

His little brother doesn't know your real name - he just calls you "stalker"

You lean in for a kiss and he helps steady you, as if you lost your balance.

He doesn't even know your name. And technically, he also doesn't know that you exist. One of the many problems with online infatuation.

When you're out together he's always checking out other girls.

When you're out together he's always checking out other guys - not only is he not into you, he's not into your entire gender!